Back to School. Where has the summer gone?

It is once again August and time for the kids to head back to school. Where has the summer gone? As this time of year approaches, I sometimes find myself feeling jealous of the school teachers that get to spend the day with my kids. I hope they realize what a privilege this is and how wonderful these human beings really are. Some how I just don't think they really get it like I do. The season brings with it the purchases of new clothes, new backpacks, new school supplies as well as new schedules, early mornings, packing lunches, sometimes new schools and new friends. And it also brings a quiet and empty house for several hours of the day. Although I welcome this quiet time, I also miss my kids.

Teegan reminds me that we need to take first day pictures. What a poser! Haha! Have a great year kids! Please remember to be smart, funny, courteous, kind, respectful, tidy, attentive, honest, and all those others great qualities I taught you about!

Teegan is entering 8th grade and her first year at Snow Canyon Middle School.

Tyler is entering his first year at Success Academy. This will be a new experience and a big adjustment. He spends half his day at the college and half the day at the high school. At the end of his senior year, if all goes as planned, he will graduate with a high school diploma and an associates degree from Dixie State College. 

Kindergarten to College and 5 minutes between

I remember the day as if it were yesterday.  She was so excited. Doning her new backpack, she looked and felt so big.We stood on the sidewalk waiting for the bus to pull up to the curb in front of our house. She was so excited to ride the bus and go to the big kids school. I was nervous and anxious for her. I couldn't believe that my baby girl was off to kindergarten already! I was excited for her too. She was growing up so fast. After she got on the bus and it drove away, I went inside the house and sobbed. Tori was off to kindergarten. No mom is ever really ready for this day.


We loaded her belongings into our Pilot and her little red Dodge Avenger. We followed her to the gas station and chuckled at her inexperience as we watched her fill her car with gas. She had so much to learn, so much more growing up to do. We knew it was time for her to be on her own. We were so excited for her new opportunities and experiences. We continued on to Cedar City following her the whole way. We helped her get settled into her new apartment, bought her groceries and a new phone. We hugged her and kissed her goodbye. "Good-bye sweet baby girl" I said hugging her and kissing her forehead. We climbed into the car and waved as we drove away. We had been so anxious for this day to come, so why was I so sad? It was a stormy, rainy August night. I cried almost in unison with the rain drops that fell onto the windshield.  I couldn't believe this day had come. I didn't feel ready to not have her live in the same house with me as she had for the past 18 years. I didn't feel ready to not see her everyday even if only for a brief moment, I didn't feel ready to not know how her day was or how she was feeling or to not hear her whistle to her bird or squeal a hello to Spice. I just didn't feel ready.

How can life go by so fast? She went to kindergarten and 5 minutes later she was off to college. Or so it seemed. I knew it was time to let her go, but it didn't make it any easier. She has only been gone for 6 days, but things are not the same without her. The house is so much quieter and a little more lonely and empty feeling. It will definitely be an adjustment. I think about her everyday and wonder how and what she is doing. Even as I type this I have to steal away to the bathroom to cry some more.

As mothers we spend every day nurturing our children. Day after day, year after year. Then one day all too soon they leave the nest and go venture out into the big world, not unlike a 5 year old venturing onto the big yellow school bus. I am not sure if we are ever prepared and I am not sure if this is a blessing or a torture. Maybe it is a little of both.

 

Can't we just go back and do it all again from the beginning? Time went by too fast. And I know I didn't teach her all that I wanted too.

I miss you Tori! sniff sniff! And I love you!